‘This world has lost its grip on me’
I’m going to go ahead and carry on the musical reference for this blog as well. Buckle up. This phrase has been shaking up my life and the way I view my future with Jesus.
This phrase is referenced in the song ‘Control’ sung by Tenth Avenue North. The lyrics marvel at the fact that God wants a relationship with us, and not only wants, he DESIRES one.
This past week I had to say and feel some tough goodbyes. Goodbye to the workplace I have called home for the past 5 and 1/2 years, goodbye to the coworkers who have become my family and daily routine. Goodbye to the career that has helped shape me into the person I am today. And goodbye to a false sense of control I’ve had in my life.
Control has been a liar in my life for too long. It’s been my most favorite frienemy, my sense of false hope and to be honest my biggest disappointment at the end of the day. I’ve always felt like I need to be two steps ahead in everything. Whether it be my career, my workplace, my relationships, my life plans, my goals.. the list goes on. And all that has done is leave me with a feeling of failure and loads of disappointment. Everything the enemy lives for and yet everything Jesus died to redeem.
The song expresses it perfectly:
‘I’ve had plans
Shattered and broken
Things I have hoped in
Fall through my hands
You have plans
To redeem and restore me
You’re behind and before me
Oh help me believe’
Jesus desires a life with us. Not because it’s going to be easy and carefree, but because it’s going to be full and purpose driven and done with the intention of Him being right by our side. This world is broken. Literally breaking and destroying at its seams. The type of pain, suffering and loss that I have seen first hand and heard around the world is unbearable. I have experienced true spiritual unrest in my daily life that I’ve worked so hard to ‘control’. Every imaginary goal I’ve achieved, lie I’ve bought into, checklist I’ve never been able to complete doesn’t compare to the sin and affliction of this world.
So where does that leave me? I know that control has been a type of thirst I can’t quite quench. A type of emptiness and longing for more.
And where does that leave Jesus? I know that He is the living water that can only satisfy that type of thirst and longing and fill that emptiness. This world HAS lost its grip on me. This world is only about this world. My Jesus is about the hearts for His kingdom. He’s about releasing and overcoming the strongholds of this world and trusting Him. For me it’s trusting Him when it’s hardest and doesn’t make sense. Trusting He has the best in store for me, way more than I could dream up myself. Trusting Him with my life when I have no clue what to do with it. I’m so thankful this world has lost its grip on me, I so badly want to show it more Jesus.
Wow, this is beautiful! This world cannot satisfy our longing souls. We must allow it to lose its grip on us!
Thanks for writing, beautiful friend.
Well said and very proud!
Praise God for your ever continuing newfound freedoms in the grips of Grace! I know the world’s hold will continue to slip away as you answer His call, moment by moment. Praying for you sweet girl, to impact this hurting world for Him, pray for us all who “hold the line” for you to remain steadfast as well. God speed!
Wow Kaitlin! This is so beautifully written! I can’t wait to see what wonderful works He does both within and through you!
Love this it really made me stop and think! You are meant too and will do amazing things! Can’t wait to watch you grow in Christ!
Thanks Raquel!
Thank you Sandy! I appreciate your encouragement 🙂
Thank you Shari! You are a wealth of encouragement and I appreciate you! 🙂
Beautiful and inspiring! Thanks for sharing your journey!
Thank you sweet friend! Love you